A LETTER..:)

My dearest xej,

Happy, happy, happy birthday! I wish you nothing but the only best. you're a full-grown lady now. Young and Fresh only 17..and I know that your dreams and goals are getting ambitious each day. You tend to do anything assuming that you can but I will divulge to you one's life painful fact - YOU ARE JUST HUMAN and you CAN'T DO anything. xej, just go with the flow just like when you were sixteen - joyful, child-like (childish and child-like are entirely different) girl who just laugh and laugh until those heartaches were gone. Being a seventeen year old is an indication to have a bitter-free life. Let go of those bitterness, forgive those people who hurt you and take care of those who loved and love you. Don't think that life gave you nothing 'coz in reality life gave you the best of everything. You have your happy and complete family, Your friends whose always been there for you all this time, your hope and fighting spirit that keep you from going on and the life itself which you are enjoying right now are such great graces from above.
Still believe in destiny, signs, wishes, power of laughter, magic of tears, true happiness, soulmate and even the simple yet unnoticed miracles of God. Just stay the same. Stop labeling yourself as one of those second bests in town because you are not one of them. You are one of the bests. Just remember the theory of existence : over 600 millions sperm cells, only you survived!, that's one sign that you are really destined to be the best.
You are old enough to know the big difference between fortuitous and inevitable, right and wrong, delusion and reality, love and infatuation, to love and to be loved, reading and comprehending, sacrifice and giving up and being a man and a human.
There are a lot of people who love xej so much. You are not just aware because you are focusing too much on other things. OK. Let's just say you don't want your parents to be disappointed....but you forgot yourself that you didn't give time for her. I understand that you're giving your parent's what's due to them...but what you're giving them is more than enough. Give yourself some rewards. Laugh some more. It seems that when you are with me you forget to give even your simplest smile. TALK to me. You know that whatever happens, you can have me. As always.

with much love,
Xej

I did this letter to myself an hour after my birthday. It's my superego that writes about me and those things that will be about me....


"Yes, my dreams are ambitious but it's always possible."

Goodbye sweet 16...

Bungisngis's birthday is today, February 21. Goodbye sweet 16. Those past few days before my birthday were really weary. It seems like the only better thing to do in this world is to sleep.
But a day before my birthday, I decided to break that vacuous mood just not to spoil my special day. I did not expect my dormmates to exert effort just to surprise me. They gave me a baby cake and a kwek-kwek. For the second time around I have a birthday cake. And I feel so special. Really.
Well, to those who had their greetings before the exact day of my existence, who greets me on the day itself, who greeted me thru text, voice text or thru call, who greeted me personally and to all of them who remembered to greet me...THANK YOU. I really do appreciate it.

I want to extend my thanks to these people who made my birthday a special one:

TO THOSE WHO CALLED:

Bleh Aila:"elow bleh, hapi birthday...blah, blah,blah...."

Bleh Char:"bleh hapi birthday! miss na kita. I hope u enjoy dis day..blah, blah, blah"...

Bleh Chiki: "hello bleh? nu ginagawa mo?! ahm, hapi birthday!, blah, blah, blah.."

GREETINGS: (this is not in order...hahaha)

Ryan: "Advance happy birthday kakamay"

Kakay: "Advance hapi birthday kakamay! love u!..

Ayno: "Best, Hapi birthday!"..

Daniel: "Advance hapi birthday sau she.. ingatan mo ang sarili mo ha. blah, blah..."

Jan louie: hapi bday to you2x, hapi bday2x, hapi bday to you...advans xej!"

Janine: "hapi bday xej!May u hav more bdays & blessings to come, Lab u fren...enjoy ur day she:)"

Aleta: "Xej, pde sa monday na ung gift?"

Liezl: "elow rummate, hapi bday! sana hapi ka now sa bday mo.."

Ate ana: "hapi bday! lab yu. ingat ka lagi ha?! dami nagmamahal sau."

Ate dimple :(actually super haba nito) "Hav sleep! give urself a time and always stand for your faith, once again hapi bday my may2x.."

Ate Mae: "Hapi birthday, always bring out da best in u 'coz i know ders a greater mye2x inside of you."

Ate Ang: "Mye! mwah! wish u da best..wak wak ka ug nawong...hahahaha"

Kring2x: "we wish u a hapi bday! enjoy dis day and u r da bida..."

Ate ching: "Api, api, api, bday maymayatot!, may God bless u always and may HE gives u ur harts desire and da best of everything.."

Arvin: (it was sent as a voice text) "hapi bday xej! hhahaha...cguro ako una grit sau noh?! hahaha ano exam natin ugma?!" %)

Father: " hapi bday."

Thea: hapi birtday!"

Noreen: "haberday mo?! ajejeje...ur a yr older now kya pls lang, magpakatino ka na.."

Mylene: Hapi bday my bestfren! i luv u tlga! khit di tau ngkikita at ngkakasama e luv pa rin kita."

Bleh Riah: "Gndang umaga blehtut! hapi hapi hapi bday! lab yu bleh!.."

Phem: "hapi bday xej..,"

Samon: "hapi, hapi bday! wish u ol da best! labzyu xej! ingats lge jan! Godbless!.."

Dhar: hapi bday xej! more bdays to come. god bless.

Bryl: hapi bday to me2x,hapi bday2x, hapi bday francois!"

Bleh hana: helow bleh, gudmorning! hapi bday! matanda ka na! hehehe luv u bleh! misu na tlga."

Xyn: "happy bday...hehe"

Sydkik: "hapi b-day sydkik ....weeeeeeeee!!17 ka n! tanda na...heheheheh..
wish u all tha best sydkik...more b-days to come..basta sydkik..ingatz lgi..hapi b-day ulit sydkik..lab u..."

Jasmine (kaka ko):"ali koh..hapi bday..mixx u xdo..labyou xdu..mwah!!!"

Kim: "hAppy b.day xej.jeje..cnxa na ha..la ko gift ubos nman gud alawans bah"

Xy: "happy bday xej.....wala me nkagreet ganina....hehhehehehhe..now nlng...wish u more bdays to come and cndles to blow...hapi bday.......luv u .....mwahhhhhhh...tsup tsup tsup...hehehehe"

Onjie: "hapi hapi hapi bday.. sayo ang inuuman, ikaw ang pulutan..hahaha UU"


Kuya Kyx: "happy bday xej!!! :D"

Ate jhanice:"happy....bday bunso.....stay sweet and beautiful....love u muawhhhh"

Bapa benj: "inaanak!..hapi bday pla!d qoh nkalimutan hehehehehe.."

kaka Benjamil: "ahehe.. wla yun ui.. mlapit na birthday mo daw oh ngayun na? ahehe.. happy bday!"

Kayko: " "happy birthday!!!"wish u all 'd best!!!"

Fatima: "advance apee b-day..!mwah! ^hugs^"

Cookie: "api bdaY"

Nubi: "xej,gusto mo ng baby hamster?..."

Jumbo: "hapi birthday kakamay!"

Krystle: "hapi bday xej!"

and those who gave some present..ahm...THANK YOU.

Cakes from jan louie, a card, kwek-kwek and a surprise from ate ching, a big and wonderful surprise from my dormmates, stufftoy from noreen and paolo, chocolate from ate ana, chocolate agen from lala, earrings from ate jhanice and nancie and a cake and baloons from ate lena. "Those things were very much appreciated and so did the people who gave them."

"there is also a gift given by someone but I did not dare to mention it because we are not in good terms".

To those people whose names are cited above, I just want you to know that you made this day as one of those wonderful days in my life and I thank you for providing me the best of it.

No...No...No....

hmmm...my friendster account has a shoutout, "TRUST. it's the word that keeps the candle of my HOPE burning..:)but I guess, just one more FALL and EVERYTHING will follow..:'c I am REALLY tired." and i mean it so much...I am just holding someone's hands for me to go on... but perhaps the pain is too much and I am tired of bearing it alone. :(

But.....I must not give up...I can do it on my own...I can still handle the pain, can still take the fall, and I can still have trust to someone, to myself, and to HIM who plans everything. And I know that HIS plans are better than what I want.

"This time, I promise, I won't be defeated..."

PUTITO, bisaya of Potato?!

Roselle really makes me laugh the other night because of her text message that goes like this, "bleh, bakit putito name mo sa fster? bisaya ng potato?" hahaha...
Tnx for giving me the idea of writing about this one.

Well, putito as well as brownito sounds cute, isn't it? :). Putito and Brownito are two little stufftoys given to me by my bestfriend - sydkik (that's not his name, that's how we call each other) together with a nailcutter, a pair of slippers and a letter written at the back of a calendar. I coined the name Putito and Brownito because both of them are chinito and the only thing that makes them differ are their color. The first one is color white and the latter is color white too :) but it has a brown coat...that's why I called it brownito.

They are really cute though my bestfriend just bought them at ukay-ukay..classic! "once nga sydkik kai ukay-ukay tau..".. these two represent the two of us. They always come in pair and they will always be at each other's side.

I do love both of them but I love more the person who gives them to me...